meandering thoughts on game creation

I’ve been thinking, in a sense.

ive needed, somewhat of an outlet, something…
im not sure. ive figured out games is probably a good option for it, though.
the thing is, i dont really care much for video games
ill play them. for sure, i mean, borderlands 2 is a fave
but…idk, something about the concept of them tires me
i sort of want to make my own games but, theres obstacles – myself, included.

klik and play is the only games tool i know my way around, though.
much as id like to use something else, ive always found them
near impossible to get to grips with personally
the only thing ive found remotely similar would be construct 2
but thats not really within the vein of what im after…that’s definitely for game-y games….
rpg maker, that works, sort of. ive been slowly working on a title in that for a while now. mainly as a way of learning how it works myself
its called clense. the thing is, its kind of really faux artsy
i love that kind of, feel and look, but the problem is i cant really legitimately do it….
maybe i can….i just need to rethink my approach, and give it meaning

i guess the problem really is not finishing what i start
i did the one tutorial for construct 2. i was impressed with it
but since then? ive not done a single thing with it. not even remotely booted it up.
i mean i get the feeling that i would LIKE to do some kind of 3d business
something along the lines of the recently released 0n0w, but not…that fancy
i want to make intriguing 3d exploring games. something that is…passive.
a thing that will sit there as you gently comb through it, inspecting anything and everything within it
i even have an idea set aside from ages ago for one.

so check this right
its this weird kinda, ruins exploration thing right. no nathan drake bs tho
you have a polaroid style camera, you can take instants of various things around you
there are puzzles to be solved within each area, the concept being that you can take photos of missing pieces to puzzles
you hold the photos up where the pieces go, and as you remove the photo from view, oh wow its there where it should be
the restrictions would be you can only carry like 5 photos at any given point
if you take any more past that, you gotta either swap the photos out or put them in your backpack.
you cant take any out your backpack, but you can look at them after youve finished the game – actual image screenshots you can share.
so its a puzzle game combined with this gentle exploration sharing type game
probably procedurally generated, who knows.

hold ups, huh?
yeah that would be right.
i want to make a 3d game. what are my choices?
two engines that wont run on my laptop
and also unity, which barely runs.
ok, look into unity. oh wait. the ui is a confusing mess
ah right, we’d also have to model everything
ok, look into blende–also a mess.
well, fuck,
back to square one, i guess.

that’s pretty much my thought process every time.
my problem, more than anything, is expectation vs reality, i feel
almost every free game engine i see promotes and prides itself on being “easy to use”
of every modern game engine i have looked at, i can only say one is truly easy to use and thats construct 2
no, not even good old clickteam fusion 2.5 makes the cut.
the ui in fusion 2 is an unholy clunky mess. not mention its literally built on 20+ y/o tech
so its like. when i jump into something new and cool, i kind of expect to be able to do SOMETHING with it just by dicking around blindly
i mean…i didnt even manage that with construct 2, but thats mostly bc i also expected it to be closer to clickteam products (its not)

i think. if anything i should stop dwelling on everything so much. start making things with ugly artwork.
theres nothing i can really do about it. sure, ill have money at some points to buy art from folk
but really, i should focus on doing it myself. an inspiration for this stuff, is probably magicdweedoo
their games are fascinating pieces and their unique awkward look to them is probably my favourite part
i need to start caring less about how things look and more about how they play
ive had a puzzle game idea in my head for approximately….fuck, possibly 8-9 years now.
i need to enact on it. i want this game to exist. hesitation has killed it every time
really. the best advice for starting to make games. is to just push yourself to make games.

yeah this isnt really anything special, im sorry. this is just my thoughts on things at half 3 in the morning. i did say this would be a personal blog of sorts.

edit: yo btw fuck programming im not doin that shit, gimmie those sweet gooeys to craft a trainwreck any day

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